I suppose feeling human isn't all that bad. Sure in the moment it hurts beyond what you can comprehend. One click, one word, one distraction, can send it all down the tubes. You think "I can't believe I did this.... oh wait, yes I can". Question - what gets us to the point that we think we're fine?
Today, at work, I made a mistake. Sure... minor in the "grand scheme of things", but at work -today- it was a big thing, for three employees at MediaSauce. I went from feeling niko sawa (I am fine - in Swahili), to humbled and crying. As I sit up late processing the day, it reminds of my life spiritually. Isn't that the way things happen? We thing we are on cruise control, and then we are humbled and we fall flat on our face. We are reminded we aren't perfect, we mess up, we sin, and there will always be another thing we wish we hadn't done. But at the end of the day, and even in the middle of it, there is grace.
Today I made a mistake. One that could have been big. If it rippled out I'm not sure how I would have handled it, but I know it wouldn't have killed me. This was one day. One day in the many days that make up this glimpse in which I call a "life". What could have been huge, by the grace of God, there was understanding and forgiveness; there was hope and a future. There was God. He was in the middle of it; in my tears, in my failure, in my humanity. He saved me. Big time.
I wouldn't say I was ready for this day. I wouldn't say that I would have ever asked for it. But what I will say is that I'm thankful for it. 11 hours later, I am thankful that I saw my humanity and saw, once again, my deep need for God's grace. It just makes my relationship with Him that much sweeter.
I pray that today you are aware of the grace that God is offering you. When you "screw up", or make a mistake, He is waiting for you to let Him save you from it. Surrender. Obey. LIVE.
Inescapably human and saved by grace,
Katie
